Aaron's profileBLUE YEARSPhotosBlogListsMore  |  Tools Help |
|
BLUE YEARS走上铁塔,为全世界的人写明信片 March 05 Kathy我的Kathy，是我生命中的重要组成部分。我觉得没有她，我过于高压和快节奏的生活就会让我整个人崩溃。在她面前，我失去了任何的伪装和光环，我宁可只静静的靠着她，而不是她靠着我。简单而自由。对于未来的期许有很多。希望那些障碍都能去除。在我进入X5阶段时，我会好好写一篇关于Kathy的文章。今晨，只是在我忙着赶路的时候。我突然顿悟到，她就是我生命里的强心剂，镇定剂，甚至安眠药。我在想，一个人的成功不但但取决于事业，更应该有家庭。有真情实感。是个玩得起输得起敢爱敢恨的大丈夫。那些只忙着事业不能用双手支撑起家庭的人，在我的价值观体系内，永远不是胜利者，而是loser.
我会继续努力，让Kathy幸福，让这几年受的委屈都烟消云散吧。
加油 December 31 突围很意外，今天收到了G的成绩。梦一般的中午，成绩单往抽屉里一丢。睡醒之后继续忙碌。
不管怎样，也拦不住我前进的脚步。因为我知道目的地在哪里。
09年终于来了。无人可挡。我一直一来所坚信的梦想。
突围吧！！！
 November 10 一段日子以来我很不喜欢装逼写英文，有时候都是逼出来的。就像Kathy对我说的，我是中国人。
一转眼十一月又过去三分之一，我有点无话可说了，时间总是在你抓住之前消失，这是一件令人失望的事情。
26号完成了GRE，也是我成长中一个重要的事件。它标志着这半年来的英语学习告一段落。我也看到了一个完全不一样的自己。操着一个流利的英语，更加自信，更加不一样。其实为什么要追求不一样。这也就是人们生活的目标和质量问题。我的目标有太遥远，但是小目标却近在咫尺。这点我还是很佩服。我比较务实的。
我对我未来的规划很完备，但不是很彻底。我对申请scholarship充满信心。因为我已经规划的很完备，并按照我的日程表在进行中。十一月一定要写完三篇论文，这是必须的！有的时候一定要强压自己才行，这才能避免大家现在都具备的一个毛病，懒惰。很多人羡慕我每天能够早起，其实我何尝不是战胜自己心中那个懒惰的自己呢。如果我明年顺利申到PHD，我想用三年把它读完。当然，我也一直答应自己，一定要修建筑的学位，我不相信我比我们学校那帮学建筑的差。对于他们我不做太多评论。
以后回来，我想九成会留在高校。因为我把它作为了毕生的事业追求，以后不为生活所迫了，50多岁还能在学校里讲学一直到自己离开这个世界。这是一件很享受并且很崇高的事情。我想我会是一个很好的教授。呵呵~本科毕业时我之所以不愿意找工作就是不太想困住自己。我是一个极度崇尚自由的人。我不太喜欢被别人压制的生活。因此，我答应了我自己开个艺术工作室是一定会去做的。我从小就崇尚艺术，我喜欢音乐、摄影和美术。一直很孤傲说自己是天生的艺术家。其实是不是艺术家并不重要。人还是要活得快乐一些。我想我一定会是一个这样的人：具备科学家的客观，工程师的严谨，艺术家的情怀，教育家的仁爱。这是我很追求的四个方面。我会一直努力下去。
出了久违的太阳让我很高兴。我是一个热爱阳光的人。觉得那是忙碌生活中片刻的喘息。
扯淡无用，务实吧。
September 05 No Title开学的校园乱哄哄的，90后入学了。躲避这几天学校的嘈杂，放了几天假，陪娟回家一趟。一路上也是写写画画，思考、感悟。在火车上看到形形色色的人群。我突然意识到，他们和我不可能有生命的交集。 我身边不同家庭背景出身的朋友，有些是知识分子家庭，有些是农民的孩子。我站在大街上，看到这身旁的人群，就强烈的感受到了这种对抗。无论个人兴趣或是人生目标。一直觉得一个成功的男人一定要在事业和生活上把握自己的原则。事业上要有魄力、有气势，要坚毅，突显领袖气质；生活上要对则是对家庭、朋友的肯定，甚至批评，同时对社会有很好的包容性等等。谈到社会包容性，就直接映射到了一个人的社会性，你的生存可能性与你自身的社会兼容性密不可分。社会总是说关注弱势群体，但我不知真正有多少人乐意贡献自己的微薄之力。 我周围很多朋友根本无法体会到那类穷苦人的生活，因为他们从未有这样的机会去接触他们。我看到72岁的老人为了体验一次坐火车的感觉被人群快挤成片的感觉，正如娟和我说的一样“有些人的处境是你永远想不到的”。我深切的觉得，这个社会不应该随便看不起谁。我个人比较鄙视的就是仗着自己有点钱或者有点背景的臭牛逼的人，还有那种不学无术混吃等死的人挥霍父母财产的人。有些人的确家庭出身好，那这并不是你仰仗的理由，因为你今天得到的这些正意味着你已经失去了一些东西。我不相信一个出身极度贫寒家的孩子不会对一个家庭背景极好的室友有一点嫉妒之心。 我很相信人生的轮回，这更是你不应看不起瞧不起别人的理由。你这辈子生在城市，下辈子没准就生在一个极度偏远的山沟里。连家庭的重担都承担不了，何谈去实现自己的良好教育。你这辈子是个健全人，下辈子没准就是你全身烧伤或者双腿残废。而那些被你瞧不起的，你看不上的人们，下辈子就过上了你这样的生活。 坐在火车上，路过那些小山村，很难想象让我在那样一个环境中，成长、生活一辈子。所以，每个人对自己生活的定位是不同的，我看到那些小山村里的人依然快乐健康，家庭幸福，这难道不是很多大都市里的人所必胜追求的么。人的欲望是永无止尽的。得到一万就想要十万，有了车就想要更好的豪华车，有了房就想着换个更大的房子，有个老婆就想找几个情人。我们在这样无止境的索取中耗尽了一生，却不知给予回报。我想这可能就是人性最大的弱点。 看着90后在校园里军训，又是一个新学年。过了冬天，我都要24岁了，很恐怖。我看到老爸头发开始白了，老妈一直在抱怨自己的皱纹和老年斑，突然意识到自己已经长大了，而学生的感觉似乎还是在我身上索绕。面对一个时代给予我们的压力，不应该总以校园作为后盾来逃避自己。媳妇儿有句经典：社会不会因为你是一个学生就对你有所照顾。当你面对着与你不同阶层，不同北京，不同文化，不同爱好，不同信仰的人们，也只能引用松下的一句话：When angry, count ten before speaking, when very angry, count a hundred! That’s all. August 27 Day in and Day outI fell exciting about the day I just passed. Amazing times.
This summer, it is a little bit hectic, anyway, it never move out the way.
The "AW"day is over while the General test is still going on. Hence, there is no any excuse for me to slack.
I love busy days, hands over the anytime when I keep my eyes on the goddame clocks.
Passion!Confidence!Diligence!Nothing more these "Big Three" can lead me success!
The day after tomorrow, I'll begin my next stage from x 4.6 to x 4.7". Big Day!Really Big!
Move! Move! !Move!!!
Over! July 25 My great AaronismI’m kinda busy this summer. Instead of helping supervisor’s project, I came back home. Everybody insist that my purpose is the Olympic. Not Really, I just wanna be with My parent for a couple of days. Only a month to go, if possible, I really wanna get a deserved score for the poor GRE test, cause no one could deter me from my dreams, However sweat. Several things haunt in my mind, UCSD, if true, the professional life as a professor, photographer, philosopher, great thinker, right? I’m tedious about the complains from my friends, such as the poor salary or unsuitable work conditions. They are my friend, no matter what they will be or I will be, that’s point I never doubt. Things changed. You must have your own way of life, to chase the style about yourself, not follow with others. I still remember I position of our generation as the lost generation. The Cynicism strike on my mind when I heard about it in today’s class, that is the reason why I am here to write some stuff to vent sth which I have though for a long time. When I went home every night after the class, seeing the lights and colors from the window of bus. I deeply realize that I have found what I am really looking for. To found my philosophy, Aaronism, sound crazy, ah? Seclusion, to be continue`````` June 22 What can I doDesign assignment, website translation, GRE AW, several test as well lots books to read.
Hectic. Life sucks.......
How can get rid of whole the stuff, and manage it as quick as possible.
I can't get down my head to think what should be done firstly.
Well.I wanna go home for few days, sleeping day in and day out.
Bridge,something can be designed in an aesthetic way, the way I've always looking for,
Some friends of mine can hardly understand what the its means to me.
Somedays out,may be I've become an engineer , hangling around the construction sites,with the mud on my boots.
Somedays after I realize the way I have to go, I make momentary desicion by myself.
After dozing for days, my poor head ,reborns May 25 upside downRecently, having thought lots of odds, upside down. I thought about Future, What is the future? Fuck the future!!! Memory as a mirror, getting a clear me. The feeling of success rebuked me, so strong. I wanna buy everything for my baby, cos I can’t right now. I feel sorry for her. Maybe It is not until the end of my education can I make everything came true, for I need more time to be distigulished from the crowd, from the every single one, from the lost generation of our times. Many people know how to attain success, but few know how to make the best use of it. “you’re really successful”,someone told me, sorry, I don't wanna let you down, but you really don’t know what the fucking situation I got. I must be going big and strong, far way from the past. The confused May day is passing by, I still not getting start to write anything about Argu or Issue. What the hell I am talking about, What the fuck days I lived. Can everything move on under schedule, Where is my so-called execution??????????? I appreciate I’m chasing my dream, pursuing long-term, ambitious goals rather than seek immediate fame and recognition, since, you know, most of us live on the material life, they seek for money, inculding me, more and more fucking money, more reality. So, A crucial test of character is whether one is able to adapt to changing social conventions without sacrificing one's principles.I know, the choice is an illusion. In reality, our lives are controlled by the society in which we live. However, people are too quick to take action; instead they should stop to think of the possible consequences of what they might do. Sitting on an night bus, I turn on the radio, a wit saying through down my head, It says that” The Life never show you a map, telling you how to get your destination, so you should prevent youself from lost your way”, Admittedly, we don't have a map or instruction, cos the only one who can tell us to do something is ourselves. Fighting for GRE, Fighting for my dreams. May 14 Perfect is the enemy of goodPerfect is the enemy of good.....
I love this saying cos I'm not sure what kinds of person I wanna be.
Since last time, I take ibt' bt exam(Tofel),I knew that I have steped to the way of life I chosed.
Time really run fast, sometime beyonds my reach. 2008 is my animal year. However, not reaching the half of it, various things seems to get out of control. I don't wanna complain or grumble somewhat.Perfect is the enemy of good, but I choose to be perfect.
Recently preparing GRE'AW,be puzzled by couple of days, I read an saying impressed me, that is"The writing process is typically frustrating and enlightening, thrilling and discouraging, humbling and exalting." In a word,It's life.
Still, To write is to throw away a great deal, not to be satisfied, to type again, and then again, and once more, and over and over...."
just less than 100days, I gotta go.....
January 10 2008 still lifeWow,I'm back.It's now 2008,Goodbay my 2007,It's wonderful time and worthy to fighting for.Whatever lost is lost,For the past year,I have been busy mediating me future plan,anyway,I have been in ChangSha for almost 5 years,Wow,It sounds great for me .There is no doubt that this struggling time will pass.When i look back for that times,I'v always wondering what I'm looking for.still,I'm holding my dream,sometimes I thought it's in the bag,but that's just a dream.back to REALITY。I hope I still have to try harder, no matter how difficult it's . Moreover, the days of my youth should be like that,indeed. Hope that in new year I can still make efforts and go ahead,maybe at any price.It's now or never.
Everybody is for himself,that's is law of jungle,whatever,I don't wanna be a somebody or I just wanna be myself,having some bosom friend,with a little woman,happy-go-lucky.
Waiting for amazing 2008 .life,with passion ,with love.
Ok,get my teeth into study now,hit it hard.
Aaron |
||||||
|
|
