Haven't been there for a looooooooooooong time.

Just pass by. I thought that there could be something happens.

I'm waiting for PHD application for two years, but when the day is close.

I just believe there is still lots of things to do.

Anyway, time goes fast.

Whenever I look back, I just wanna thanks everyone and every minute from GOD.

I bless every friend of mine be happy.

No matter what's will going on for my application,

I just bless, for everything.

 

我很不喜欢装逼写英文，有时候都是逼出来的。就像Kathy对我说的，我是中国人。

一转眼十一月又过去三分之一，我有点无话可说了，时间总是在你抓住之前消失，这是一件令人失望的事情。

26号完成了GRE，也是我成长中一个重要的事件。它标志着这半年来的英语学习告一段落。我也看到了一个完全不一样的自己。操着一个流利的英语，更加自信，更加不一样。其实为什么要追求不一样。这也就是人们生活的目标和质量问题。我的目标有太遥远，但是小目标却近在咫尺。这点我还是很佩服。我比较务实的。

 

我对我未来的规划很完备，但不是很彻底。我对申请scholarship充满信心。因为我已经规划的很完备，并按照我的日程表在进行中。十一月一定要写完三篇论文，这是必须的！有的时候一定要强压自己才行，这才能避免大家现在都具备的一个毛病，懒惰。很多人羡慕我每天能够早起，其实我何尝不是战胜自己心中那个懒惰的自己呢。如果我明年顺利申到PHD，我想用三年把它读完。当然，我也一直答应自己，一定要修建筑的学位，我不相信我比我们学校那帮学建筑的差。对于他们我不做太多评论。

 

以后回来，我想九成会留在高校。因为我把它作为了毕生的事业追求，以后不为生活所迫了，50多岁还能在学校里讲学一直到自己离开这个世界。这是一件很享受并且很崇高的事情。我想我会是一个很好的教授。呵呵~本科毕业时我之所以不愿意找工作就是不太想困住自己。我是一个极度崇尚自由的人。我不太喜欢被别人压制的生活。因此，我答应了我自己开个艺术工作室是一定会去做的。我从小就崇尚艺术，我喜欢音乐、摄影和美术。一直很孤傲说自己是天生的艺术家。其实是不是艺术家并不重要。人还是要活得快乐一些。我想我一定会是一个这样的人：具备科学家的客观，工程师的严谨，艺术家的情怀，教育家的仁爱。这是我很追求的四个方面。我会一直努力下去。

 

出了久违的太阳让我很高兴。我是一个热爱阳光的人。觉得那是忙碌生活中片刻的喘息。

 

扯淡无用，务实吧。

 

I fell exciting about the day I just passed. Amazing times.

This summer, it is a little bit hectic, anyway, it never move out the way.

The "AW"day is over while the General test is still going on. Hence, there is no any excuse for me to slack.

I love busy days, hands over the anytime when I keep my eyes on the goddame clocks.

Passion!Confidence!Diligence!Nothing more these "Big Three" can lead me success!

The day after tomorrow, I'll begin my next stage from x 4.6 to x 4.7". Big Day!Really Big!

Move! Move! !Move!!!

Over!

I’m kinda busy this summer. Instead of helping supervisor’s project, I came back home. Everybody insist that my purpose is the Olympic. Not Really, I just wanna be with My parent for a couple of days.

Only a month to go, if possible, I really wanna get a deserved score for the poor GRE test, cause no one could deter me from my dreams, However sweat. Several things haunt in my mind, UCSD, if true, the professional life as a professor, photographer, philosopher, great thinker, right? I’m tedious about the complains from my friends, such as the poor salary or unsuitable work conditions. They are my friend, no matter what they will be or I will be, that’s point I never doubt. Things changed. You must have your own way of life, to chase the style about yourself, not follow with others. I still remember I position of our generation as the lost generation. The Cynicism strike on my mind when I heard about it in today’s class, that is the reason why I am here to write some stuff to vent sth which I have though for a long time.

When I went home every night after the class, seeing the lights and colors from the window of bus. I deeply realize that I have found what I am really looking for.  

To found my philosophy, Aaronism, sound crazy, ah?

Seclusion, to be continue``````

Design assignment, website translation, GRE AW, several test as well lots books to read.

Hectic. Life sucks.......

How can get rid of whole the stuff, and manage it as quick as possible.

I can't get down my head to think what should be done firstly.

Well.I wanna go home for few days, sleeping day in and day out.

 

Bridge,something can be designed in an aesthetic way, the way I've always looking for,

Some friends of mine can hardly understand what the its means to me.

Somedays out,may be I've become an engineer , hangling around the construction sites,with the mud on my boots.

Somedays after I realize the way I have to go, I make momentary desicion by myself.

 

After dozing for days, my poor head ,reborns

Recently, having thought lots of odds, upside down. I thought about Future, What is the future? Fuck the future!!!

Memory as a mirror, getting a clear me. The feeling of success rebuked me, so strong. I wanna buy everything for my baby, cos I can’t right now. I feel sorry for her. Maybe It is not until the end of my education can I make everything came true, for I need more time to be distigulished from the crowd, from the every single one, from the lost generation of our times.

Many people know how to attain success, but few know how to make the best use of it. “you’re really successful”,someone told me, sorry, I don't wanna let you down, but you really don’t know what the fucking situation I got. I must be going big and strong, far way from the past. The confused May day is passing by, I still not getting start to write anything about Argu or Issue. What the hell I am talking about, What the fuck days I lived. Can everything move on under schedule, Where is my so-called execution???????????

I appreciate I’m chasing my dream, pursuing long-term, ambitious goals rather than seek immediate fame and recognition, since, you know, most of us live on the material life, they seek for money, inculding me, more and more fucking money, more reality. So, A crucial test of character is whether one is able to adapt to changing social conventions without sacrificing one's principles.I know, the choice is an illusion. In reality, our lives are controlled by the society in which we live. However, people are too quick to take action; instead they should stop to think of the possible consequences of what they might do.

Sitting on an night bus, I turn on the radio, a wit saying through down my head, It says that” The Life never show you a map, telling you how to get your destination, so you should prevent youself from lost your way”, Admittedly, we don't have a map or instruction, cos the only one who can tell us to do something is ourselves.

Fighting for GRE, Fighting for my dreams.

 

Wow,I'm back.It's now 2008,Goodbay my 2007,It's wonderful time and worthy to fighting for.Whatever lost is lost,For the past year,I have been busy mediating me future plan,anyway,I have been in ChangSha for almost 5 years,Wow,It sounds great for me .There is no doubt that this struggling time will pass.When i look back for that times,I'v always wondering what I'm looking for.still,I'm holding my dream,sometimes I thought it's in the bag,but that's just a dream.back to REALITY。I hope I still have to try harder, no matter how difficult it's . Moreover, the days of my youth should  be like that,indeed. Hope that in new year I can still make efforts and go ahead,maybe at any price.It's now or never.

Everybody is for himself,that's is law of jungle,whatever,I don't wanna be a somebody or I just wanna be myself,having some bosom friend,with a little woman,happy-go-lucky.

Waiting for amazing 2008 .life,with passion ,with love.

Ok,get my teeth into study now,hit it hard.

Aaron

  今天坐在了曾经考研备考时期的教室里，现在已经不再是坐满了人，在今天烟雨的天气里，显得格外萧条。看见了从前在讲台前写下的“占地为王”，这也是属于我的考研印记。

  几个月来，就是人生的转折，出分前我总在想，我究竟该怎样面对这场考试，如何来怀念，如何去淡忘，来看待这场考试。眼下考研过去两个月了，分数也出来了，复试就快开始了。还算顺利的度过了这一关，也很久没有坐下来好好思考一下自己的生活。前几天去了原来考场的教学楼，坐在了考试时的位置上，看到了在英语考试时，心急如焚在桌面上的涂鸦，想起了短短十二个小时内不变和改变着的场景，心里有种挣扎。

  这几天又忙毕业设计，又忙复试，不知不觉就这样过去了三周，总觉得一天的日子没过多久就结束了。天天泡在寝室，偶尔到校区，会听到校园里广播站的歌声，在堕落吃饭，心中总是闪现着几个月前的自己。今天在我走进研楼的时候，似乎就看到了曾经站在窗口下踱步或是挣扎的自己，想起这过去的两百多个日日夜夜，希望能赶快忘掉。我通过考研成长了一些，体会到了很多当年高考没有的感觉，或许这就是责任感吧，因为我相信，在过去的这四年里片断般的成长。

  长沙迎来了它的梅雨季节，放下笔继续忙碌，白天忙设计，晚上搞复习。可能就是在这样的生活总，我又悄然告别了我的大学。我在期待下一个假期和下一次的开学。

 

一个月没有更新，而且觉得一个月很快就过去了。我非常遗憾的是，最后考试这几天没有把记忆用相机记录下来，包括二十号中午那一霎那的阳光和希望。

十二小时换取了什么，我还不得而知。总之这半年的生活就结束了。似乎有点像高考完的感觉。无所谓兴奋，平静而已。刚才去了趟天天自习的教室，可能大家会在以后的不同时间段来到这里，在看看这个曾经和我们一起战斗过的地方。彼此擦身而过，在201留下各自的气息。

我早已料到，无论结果如何，我肯定会怀念这半年的生活。因为它占据了我太多的时间和精力。为什么写2006年的时候，什么也写不出来。8月我从家回来，长沙那么热的天气，我一个人每天早出晚归。在中南的操场上跑步，清晨六点多。很多的时候看到的，不是这些就是那些。进了九月，从杭州回来。十一的时候在教室，抬着头看着校庆时满校园的焰火。十一月走过了就是十二月。我回头翻看自己的复习日程。信心满满的迎来了新年。新年的时候，我开始对考试后的生活充满了期待和幻想。这半年的生活，就像长沙的天气。在201认识的这些人，在考研过程中认识的所有人，在进入考场的一霎那，都好像成了朋友。大家互赠祝福，彼此鼓励。我从另一个楼梯走上了考场，在这个教室我几乎谁也不认识。挨着窗户，是我很喜欢的位置。考试的两天过得飞快。最后的专业课提前交卷出来后，我大吼。

       今天过了考研后的第一天，一天很空虚的生活。昨天似乎很多人都不开心。寝室也居然漆黑一片，这几个小时的停电，街上顿时拥挤，走在人群里，看着狂躁不安的街市。QQ的昵称终于历经了两年从X3变成了X4。这两年里成长了很多很多，至少，我找到了真正的自己，过回了还算正常的生活。其实我还没有准备好把名字改过来，但是既然改了，就这样吧。人总要前行。早晚还是要变的。早变也有早变的好。其实本想用了疯癫的音乐来为今年第一篇写给自己的东西一点振奋。还是改了。

       昨天清理自己所有的东西，告别了一个时代。期待下学期的生活，期待-------

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

最近长沙下了不少雨，那天在店子里吃饭，堕落街突然停电了。走在这被雨淋湿的街，看到这从没经历过的黑暗。

吃过饭，习惯到音像店去看看。它几乎陪我走过了大学四年的生活。我喜欢那个留着短发的女老板，和她可爱的女儿。男老板很和气，他们是幸福的一家人。每每路过这个店子，即使不进去，我也习惯性的瞥一眼。

那天忽然发现，店子门口挂了转让的牌子，让我忐忑了好几天。和老板随便在店子里翻唱片，现在大家都用MP3，没什么人来买CD的了。老板决定转行。从乡村音乐聊到流行朋克，才发现原来自己听过很多的中文歌，高中时期对华语乐坛，真是了如指掌。我越发的开始喜欢独立制作人，简单的音乐和单纯流露的情感。即使是今天看来，还是很怀念。就像忽然听到许美静唱歌一样。

那天室友问我，忙完这段考研的日子，去做的第一件事情是什么。我说，去老板的店子翻唱片。我从没有这样有计划的过生活，从每天的朦胧觉醒，到朦胧的睡去。这场一个人的狂欢，曾让我叫苦不迭。似乎每天清晨，自己的灵魂和意志先从身体中出壳，然后它们带着我空空的躯体逃离温暖的被窝。对一个教室有了归属感，对自己常常习惯坐着的第一排，不管后面风吹草动的生活产生了些许留恋。昨天看到一个小孩在翻手中的多拉A梦。瞥见了一眼定价，13块6。想当初我看的时候，才2块多一本，所以老妈送了我一套。

在这长沙阴雨连绵中，一个人又开始想念一些离散的记忆，曾经喜欢的女生或是没有唱完的歌。

走出音像店，整个街又亮了起来。